Wow, being a student again is a big adjustment! This is crazy. I'm taking three classes, and now I've had the introductory class of each one. This means I have the lists of readings and assignments. This in turn leads me to crave a stiff drink in the middle of the afternoon.
In one class, snappily called Foundations of Media Theory and Cultural Studies, I have to read a book each week. A book. Each week. Marx. Horkheimer. Barthes. Foucault. A whole book.
Two other courses, too, each with its own set of readings. Assignments to hand in on a weekly basis, plus papers, plus seminar presentations. I'm a teaching assistant, too, charged with grading the work of undergraduate students in a first-year course on Canadian news media. (It's not sexy, but it's required.) And did I mention that I'm continuing to work as an editor? Gotta pay the bills.
As I consider the above, the same four words keep coming to mind: What am I doing? (Four other words: Get me a drink.)
I didn't expect this to be easy. I don't even want it to be easy -- it shouldn't be. And I know my academic skills will come back to me, I'll get back into the groove, it'll be fine, yadda yadda, but till then? Till then, it's harrrd. Oh, and to make it just a little more difficult, I'm not used to reading being working. I need to spend hours on end reading, but the little voices in my head say, "Hey, you're reading again? Get to work!"
Whew. There you go. Don't run away screaming -- I promise I won't whine continually for the foreseeable future. It's just the first week, and it's scary. And Em said she wanted to hear it. She may regret that...
* * *
I'm not a big hockey fan, but I am a good Canadian. Our team's the best in the world! Woo-hoo! (I didn't watch the game on TV, but I heard the last few minutes on my beloved CBC radio.)
Wednesday, September 15, 2004